How Single Moms Can Actually Enjoy Vacation: 12 Strategies That Build in 'Me Time'
Let's be honest: as a single mom, the phrase "relaxing vacation" can feel like a cruel joke. You're thinking about logistics, safety, budget, keeping the kids entertained, meal planning, and somehow—somehow—finding a moment for yourself. The truth? Family vacations aren't really vacations for single moms unless we intentionally design them that way.
But here's what most travel articles won't tell you: you can absolutely enjoy vacation with your kids and get genuine me-time. It requires strategy, realistic expectations, and releasing the guilt that comes with prioritizing yourself. After years of solo parenting adventures and countless conversations with other single moms who travel, I've learned that the best vacations aren't about perfection—they're about intentional pockets of joy for everyone, including you.
This isn't another generic "pack snacks and book a cruise" guide. These are 12 battle-tested strategies that actually work for building rest, rejuvenation, and authentic me-time into vacations when you're the only adult in the room.
Table of Contents
- Strategy #1: Choose Destinations With Built-In Childcare
- Strategy #2: Embrace the Power of Kids' Clubs (And Release the Guilt)
- Strategy #3: Build "Parallel Play" Into Your Itinerary
- Strategy #4: Schedule One Daily "Mom Moment" Non-Negotiably
- Strategy #5: Master the Art of Strategic Accommodation Selection
- Strategy #6: Leverage Activity-Based Downtime
- Strategy #7: Travel With Another Single Parent Family
- Strategy #8: Create "Quiet Time" Rituals Even on Vacation
- Strategy #9: Outsource the Planning to All-Inclusive Options
- Strategy #10: Design Experiences Where Kids Are Entertained While You Relax
- Strategy #11: Set Boundaries Before You Leave Home
- Strategy #12: Reframe What "Success" Looks Like
Strategy #1: Choose Destinations With Built-In Childcare
Why it matters: The fastest path to me-time is picking places where professional childcare is already part of the infrastructure.
Not all destinations are created equal for single parents. The smartest vacation decision you'll make is selecting a location that expects parents to need breaks and has built the systems to support it. Think family camps, all-inclusive resorts with kids' clubs, or cruise lines with extensive children's programming.
Solo parents have plenty of opportunities for some "me time" while on the cruise thanks to the kids' clubs. Similarly, family camps like Camp Tawonga in California or UC Santa Barbara Family Vacation Center offer structured age-based activity groups where kids are supervised and engaged for hours daily—giving you legitimate adult time.
Specific destinations to consider:
- Club Med resorts (kids' clubs for ages 4-17 included in package)
- Disney cruises (Camp Oceaneer programs for ages 3-12)
- All-inclusive resorts in Mexico like those in Riviera Maya with free supervised kids' clubs at restaurants
- Dude ranches in the western US with separate kids' programming
- Family camps throughout California, Oregon, and Colorado
Pro tip: When researching, specifically search "single parent friendly" + destination name. Look for reviews from other solo parents about how welcoming and supportive the staff was.
Strategy #2: Embrace the Power of Kids' Clubs (And Release the Guilt)
Why it matters: Kids' clubs aren't about abandoning your children—they're about giving them age-appropriate social experiences while you recharge.
I am a single mom with only one kid (age 3) not two, but I have found that family camp is the single best way for me to get a break. The guilt is real, mama. But here's the truth: your kids often have MORE fun with peers their own age doing structured activities than trailing after you.
Modern kids' clubs at quality resorts offer everything from art projects to beach games, treasure hunts, and age-appropriate educational activities. Your 6-year-old isn't sitting in a corner wishing you were there—they're making friendship bracelets and playing capture the flag.
How to make it work:
- Start small: On day one, enroll your kids for just 90 minutes while you grab coffee alone and read a chapter of your book
- Check in with them: After the first session, ask what they did and who they met—their enthusiasm will ease your guilt
- Gradually extend: By day three, you might book them for a full morning while you get a massage or lounge poolside
- Create anticipation: Frame it as "You get to do cool activities with new friends!" not "Mommy needs a break from you"
Reality check: Most kids 4+ are thrilled with kids' clubs after the first visit. If your child genuinely struggles with separation anxiety, that's different—but don't project your guilt onto their potential enjoyment.
Strategy #3: Build "Parallel Play" Into Your Itinerary
Why it matters: You don't have to be actively entertaining your kids every second to create meaningful vacation memories.
Remember when your toddler would play independently nearby while you folded laundry? The same concept works on vacation. Choose activities where kids are safely engaged in their thing while you can truly decompress in yours—in the same space.
Aside from seriously elevating my sandcastle game, I loved this activity as a solo-parent traveler because I got a little bit of a break... I was an active participant in the class, but I could have easily just vegged in a beach chair and had a moment to myself without leaving my kids' presence.
Parallel play vacation activities:
- Beach days with sandcastle building classes (instructor engages kids; you read under an umbrella 10 feet away)
- Resort pools with play structures (kids splash; you float in the adult section or lounge within eyesight)
- Nature centers with self-guided trails (kids explore; you walk at your own pace absorbing the quiet)
- Hotel rooms with balconies (kids watch a movie inside; you sip wine on the balcony)
- Interactive museums (kids do scavenger hunts; you appreciate art at adult pace)
The magic: You're technically "with" your kids so no guilt, but you're not actively parenting—you're supervising while decompressing. This is legitimate rest.
Strategy #4: Schedule One Daily "Mom Moment" Non-Negotiably
Why it matters: If you don't proactively claim time for yourself, vacation will slip by without a single restorative moment.
Here's your new rule: Every single day of vacation includes one 30-60 minute block that belongs exclusively to you. Write it into the itinerary like any other activity. Treat it as sacred.
What your "mom moment" might look like:
- Morning: Wake up 45 minutes before kids, grab coffee, journal on the balcony
- Midday: While kids are at lunch and kids' club, get a 50-minute massage
- Afternoon: Enroll kids in resort activity; take yourself to the beach with your Kindle
- Evening: Order room service, let kids watch movie, soak in the tub with face mask
The psychological shift: This isn't selfish—it's modeling self-care for your children. They need to see that adults have needs too, and that taking care of yourself makes you a better, more patient parent. Research shows children of parents who practice self-care develop healthier boundaries and emotional regulation.
Strategy #5: Master the Art of Strategic Accommodation Selection
Why it matters: Your lodging choice is the single biggest factor determining whether you get rest or feel trapped.
A standard hotel room where everyone shares one space = vacation prison for a single mom after 7pm. You need separate spaces where kids can sleep/play while you have adult time.
A mobile home type property or a hotel room with a balcony or separate lounge is a LIFE SAVER when you're travelling with a toddler and get to the point where you think you might explode if you don't get 60 seconds of peace to drink a cup of coffee.
Accommodation types that create me-time:
- Suites with separate bedrooms (kids sleep in one room; you stay up reading/watching TV in the other)
- Vacation rentals with actual living rooms (kids go to bed; you pour wine and decompress on the couch)
- Rooms with balconies or patios (kids settle inside; you sit outside under the stars)
- Adjoining rooms at hotels (kids in one room; you in the other—splurge worthy!)
- Cabins at family camps with porches
Budget hack: An Airbnb two-bedroom apartment often costs the same or less than a single hotel room, plus you get a kitchen (save money, gain space).
Strategy #6: Leverage Activity-Based Downtime
Why it matters: The most exhausting vacations are when kids expect constant entertainment from you. Outsource to professionals.
Your job isn't to be cruise director. Book activities where someone else is leading, teaching, or engaging your kids while you observe or step away entirely.
Activity types that give you breathing room:
- Guided nature tours (ranger leads hike; you walk mindfully at the back)
- Surf or swim lessons (instructor teaches for 60+ minutes; you read on beach)
- Kids' cooking classes at resorts (chef entertains; you hit the spa)
- Horseback riding tours (guide manages group; you enjoy scenery)
- Organized kids' sports at resorts (tennis, soccer, beach volleyball with counselors)
- Multi-hour snorkeling excursions (guides supervise; you decompress underwater)
Cost-benefit: Yes, activities cost money. But 45 minutes of true mental rest is worth $40. Budget for experiences that buy you decompression time.
Strategy #7: Travel With Another Single Parent Family
Why it matters: Two single parents = built-in childcare rotation system and adult companionship.
I have also vacationed with my kid with my older adult relatives (on a cruise) and with a friend (flew to Hawaii). This is genius-level strategy. When you travel with another single parent family, you can trade off supervising all the kids while the other parent gets solo time.
How to make it work:
- Day 1 morning: You supervise all kids at pool while friend gets massage
- Day 1 afternoon: Friend supervises all kids while you read by beach
- Day 2: Reverse schedule
- Evenings: Trade off—one night you put all kids to bed while friend goes to hotel bar; next night you switch
Bonus: Kids have built-in playmates, so they're less demanding of you. And you have another adult to talk to, share meals with, and split driving/logistics duties.
Where to find travel partners: Single parent Facebook groups, local single parent meetups, friends from your kids' school, family camp communities.
Strategy #8: Create "Quiet Time" Rituals Even on Vacation
Why it matters: Kids (and you) need daily downtime to avoid vacation meltdowns.
It's tempting to try and fill every moment on a trip with Fun Activities so you can be sure you're having the Best Time Ever. But relax – single parenting is hard at the best of times, but when you don't have the option of popping the kids in front of CBeebies for an hour or turfing them into the garden, you need downtime, for everyone's sanity.
Daily quiet time structure:
- After lunch: Return to room/rental for 60-90 minute mandatory quiet time
- Kids can: Read, do travel journals, play quiet games, nap, watch one show
- You can: Nap, read, sit on balcony doing nothing, call a friend, meditate
Why it works: This isn't just for you—kids get overstimulated on vacation too. The mid-day break prevents late afternoon meltdowns and gives everyone a reset. Frame it positively: "This is how we recharge our batteries so we can have more fun later!"
Strategy #9: Outsource the Planning to All-Inclusive Options
Why it matters: Single mom life = decision fatigue. All-inclusive vacations remove hundreds of decisions.
With an all-inclusive package, you'll be free to think about spending time with your children as Club Med takes care of all the rest. Accommodation, transportation, meals & drinks, activities, access to clubs for kids aged 4 to 17...it's all included in your package.
At home, you make approximately 487 decisions daily about food, activities, logistics, and parenting. All-inclusive vacations eliminate 90% of those decisions.
What "all-inclusive" handles for you:
- ✓ Every meal (no cooking, no restaurant research)
- ✓ All drinks and snacks (no budgeting per meal)
- ✓ Kids' activities and clubs (no entertainment planning)
- ✓ Many water sports and activities (no à la carte costs)
- ✓ Often transfers from airport (no logistics)
Best all-inclusive options for single moms:
- Club Med (exceptional kids' clubs, single parent discounts sometimes available)
- Beaches Resorts (Caribbean all-inclusives with Sesame Street programming)
- Cruises (everything included, multiple dining options, kids' programs)
Budget reality: All-inclusive can be more economical than piecing together lodging + meals + activities separately. Run the numbers.
Strategy #10: Design Experiences Where Kids Are Entertained While You Relax
Why it matters: The vacation sweet spot is activities where kids' fun = your rest in real-time.
The absolute best vacation activities are ones where kids are having the time of their lives AND you're simultaneously getting rest/joy in the same moment.
Perfect single-parent vacation activities:
Dolphin cruises at sunset: Cetacean Cruises Dolphin and Nature Sunset Cruise... depart from The Wharf entertainment district in Orange Beach which is a mecca of shopping, dining and other entertainment. Kids are mesmerized watching for dolphins, you're sipping a drink watching the sunset.
Lazy river floats at water parks: Kids float safely in tubes, you float nearby completely relaxed.
Resort movie nights under the stars: Kids watch movie on big screen, you lay on blanket gazing at stars.
Scenic train rides: Kids press faces to windows, you read or nap.
Beach bonfires with s'mores: Kids roast marshmallows, you stare into flames decompressing.
The pattern: Look for activities with built-in entertainment that doesn't require your active engagement.
Strategy #11: Set Boundaries Before You Leave Home
Why it matters: If kids expect 24/7 entertainment from you, that's what they'll demand. Reset expectations proactively.
Before you ever pack a bag, have an honest family meeting about what vacation will look like. Set expectations that vacation is for EVERYONE to rest and have fun—including mom.
What to say to your kids:
"We're going on vacation! Here's how it's going to work: You'll get to do lots of fun things like [list exciting activities]. Some of those things I'll do with you. Some of those things you'll do with new friends at kids' club or activities. And every day, we'll each have some quiet time to rest. Vacation is for all of us to recharge, and that means mama needs time to relax too. When I'm rested and happy, we have even more fun together. Sound good?"
Boundary examples to establish:
- "We're not doing activities every minute—some days we'll just hang at the pool"
- "You'll try kids' club for at least one hour to see if you like it"
- "We'll have quiet time in our room every afternoon"
- "Sometimes mama will do grown-up things while you do kid things"
The psychology: Kids can handle boundaries when they're explained clearly and consistently. The key is YOUR belief that you deserve rest.
Strategy #12: Reframe What "Success" Looks Like
Why it matters: If you measure success by Pinterest-perfect moments, you'll feel like you failed. Adjust your metrics.
There's always a moment on a trip where you're having dinner and you look around at all those married couples looking so completely happy... and you feel like literally The Worst Mother of All Time. When you're a single parent you just have to tweak your idea of what a holiday is... It's the two of you (or three, or four) having an adventure.
Old success metrics (abandon these):
- ✗ Perfect Instagram photos of everyone smiling
- ✗ Seeing every tourist attraction in the guidebook
- ✗ Kids saying "best day ever!" every single day
- ✗ Zero meltdowns or conflicts
- ✗ Feeling energized and patient 24/7
New success metrics (embrace these):
- ✓ You got 3+ hours of genuine me-time over the week
- ✓ Kids tried something new and talked about it excitedly
- ✓ You had at least one moment of pure joy or peace
- ✓ Everyone survived and you're still speaking to each other
- ✓ You modeled self-care and boundary-setting for your children
- ✓ You created at least one meaningful memory together
The mindset shift: As a team of two, Flea and I have a freedom and spontaneity that I don't think many families have. We travel where we like, do what we like. Your vacation doesn't look like the traditional two-parent family vacation—and that's not a deficit, it's a different kind of adventure. You're showing your kids resilience, independence, and the importance of self-care. Those are profound gifts.
The Bottom Line: You Deserve Vacation Too
Here's what no one tells single moms about vacation: Family vacations aren't a break for the grown-ups. The whole reason for taking a vacation in the first place is to get a break from the stress of daily life. When you bring your kids along, not only do you still have to keep up with your daily routine, but also it's actually more work than usual... What this means is that family vacations don't really end up being vacations for Solo Moms at all.
Unless you design them differently.
These 12 strategies aren't about being a "perfect" parent—they're about being a sustainable one. They're about recognizing that your rest isn't selfish, it's essential. They're about building a vacation structure where EVERYONE gets what they need, including you.
You're already doing the impossible every single day—managing a household, raising children, working, being everything to everyone. Vacation should restore you, not deplete you further.
So book that cruise with the kids' club. Schedule that massage while your kids are at resort activities. Wake up early to watch the sunrise alone. Let your kids go to bed while you sit on the balcony with wine and stars. Release the guilt.
Your children don't need a martyr mom who gives them every second of vacation while running on empty. They need a mom who shows them that self-care isn't selfish—it's survival. And they need the memories of adventures you took together, where everyone (including you) actually enjoyed themselves.
Start planning that trip, mama. Your next vacation can actually be a vacation. And you deserve every moment of rest you claim for yourself.
What strategy will you try on your next family vacation? Your me-time is waiting.